The Water Diviner (2014 film)

Category: Australian wartime drama

Directed by: Russell Crowe

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The timing of this movie review is somewhat fortuitous - ANZAC Day is a week away, so now is a good a time as any to publish my review of the 2014 World War I drama, The Water Diviner.

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Some of you may be familiar with the term deus ex machina, a literal translation of the phrase "god from the machine" and this term is used in literature or performance art to describe a contrived and/or unrealistic solution to a problem the plot presents. 

Some examples of this phenomenon you might be familiar with include Lord Of The Rings where the Great Eagles appear out of nowhere to take Frodo and Samwise out of Mordor once the ring has been destroyed - despite not being part of the plot at any previous stage. The aliens in War Of The Worlds suddenly die because of…bacteria. In Sicario 2, Bernicio Del Toro's character somehow survives a point-blank gun shot to the head. And the convoluted plan to stab The Creeper with a weather vane somehow works out in Jeepers Creepers: Reborn - these are all deus ex machina. Now, while a bit of DeM isn't a death-knell for a movie, you have to keep in mind that if you're going to employ an improbable resolution to a plot point, just don't take the piss.

And why "god of the machine", you may ask? Because performers who played the gods in the dramas of old would be lowered down into a scene by winches or ropes (machines) to do their god thing.

So why am starting off a movie review with a description of an obscure Latin phrase? Because there is one specific scene in the 2014 war-time drama movie The Water Diviner, starring and directed by Russell Crowe, where the deus ex machina was so egregious that not only was the piss being taken, but my bladder was being absolutely violated.

Primate (2025 film)

Category: Animal horror/teen horror.

Directed by: Johannes Roberts

Similar to: Cujo

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I don't usually watch movies in the cinema. Partly because of cost (of both tickets and refreshments), partly because of the convenience of streaming and partly because not all movies are cinematic experiences. However, my teenage son wanted to go see this, we found discounted tickets and so off we went.

I went in with low-to-middling expectations - the first sign that I should be worried was the fact that when we bought our tickets, we could pick literally anywhere in the cinema to sit indicating that there was low demand to see this. Once the movie started proper, there was a total of twelve people seated, including a pair of middle-aged women - a scenario that struck me as incredibly strange. Undeterred, I kept an open mind and decided the quality of the work should speak for itself. 

Now, the only burning question remaining: is this movie about a hominid ape or a high-ranking Catholic bishop?

The plot:

Lucy (Johnny Sequoyah) returns home to Hawaii alongside her friends Kate (Victoria Wyant), Hannah (Jess Alexander) and Kate's older brother Nick (Benjamin Cheng) and is reunited with her father Adam (Troy Kotsur, but I could have sworn was Gary Sinise) and younger sister Erin (Gia Hunter). Adam is an author and animal conservationist, and his recently deceased wife was a professor of linguistics who had taught their pet chimpanzee Ben (Miguel Torres Umba in a physically-demanding role) to communicate by using sign language and a sound board.